07 June 2014

June Challenge...

Halfway through the year, already.  It's hard to believe.  I'm scared to look at my list of 'resolutions' I made 6 months ago.  I never shared them because there'd be accountability if I did.  But I knew they were there.

Last month, after my surgery I was struck by a comment by a friend.  I told her I couldn't look down due to pain and therefor couldn't read.  She exclaimed, "Oh, that must have been awful for you!"  Here's the thing.  It wasn't.  I didn't even think much about it.  Part of that was due to pain and such, but mostly it was because I had gotten out of the habit.  

I haven't read in a few months.  Well, I haven't read anything worth reading.  I had been reading 'candy.'  And as a result when my husband handed me a scholarly work, something 'nutritious,' I almost couldn't handle it.  It was bad.  I realized just how 'out of shape' I have gotten.  There very well may be a correlation to my own physical shape as well.

So, as I think about having six months behind me and six months before me, I looked back over my reading goals.  I have two down.  That's two out of 24!  It's a miserable statistic.  I could forgive myself if I had been really busy, but I have no excuse.  So, for the month of June, I am going to try to get back to reading.  I am going to endeavor to turn off the Roku at night after Chas has gone to bed (unless the Hubs wants to watch a Doctor Who or Farscape) and read.  I want to look back over my list.  There are some good books there.  I need to get back to it.

Also, I was reminded in prayer this week about my 'One Word.'  I'm sure most saw the challenge to pick a word for the year back in January when everything was new and there was nothing but possibilities.  :)  My word was:  Wisdom.  I have not been very wise here lately and I have not been actively seeking wisdom.  I've fallen off the wagon, as it were.  I also want to do better with this.  I want this idea of seeking wisdom to color my choices.

I hope to incorporate more of those failed resolutions, but I have to be wise about it.  If I look back at this list, chances are it will be overwhelming.  Instead, I hope to incorporate these ideas slowly.  If I can master these two in June, maybe I can pick out another couple in July and so on.  Who knows, maybe I can actually have the whole list in practice by December.  Just in time for next year's resolutions.  But let's not get ahead of ourselves.  

I Did What?

I signed up for a 5K.  This is ridiculous for SO many reasons.  Namely, because I haven't run consistently for, oh, about 5 months or so.  Not to mention there is the whole recovering from surgery.  Oh, and did I mention that the day that I'm running, I'm also going to me working at an all-day event at my church?  Yes.  I am insane.  

It's been one week since I signed up and it's been 5 days since my surgeon cleared me for most activity.  Now, ask me how many times I've gotten on the treadmill.  Twice.  Yep, two times in two weeks.  I know, I know.  I'll be in fighting shape in NO time, right?  And both of those times I was walking at a snail's pace.  Old women at the mall walk faster.  Seriously.

So, why did I do this?  Well, for one, my BFF asked me.  She and her sister put together a team for this 5K.  It sounded like fun.  Even though she's supah skinny and still losing, she offered to walk with me if I need it.  I'm still all kinds of worried because I can just see me slowing the WHOLE team down.  Like seriously, I worry about that.  

Secondly, I did it because it was a goal.  It was a goal I made in January.  I wanted to do a 5K, now to be completely honest, I wanted to RUN a 5K, but I'll handle completing it even if I have to crawl.  Now, I have this thing out there.  I did it.  I paid a fee (and I don't play with non-refundables).  I'm signed up.  It's happening whether I train or not.  Now, it's up to me to get myself in gear and only moderately embarrass myself.

And lastly, because why not?  I'm not entering a super-competitive 5K.  Its one of those 'fun' ones.  So, maybe I do completely embarrass myself.  I drag the entire team down and they have a miserable time.  But what if I don't?  What if we all go and have a blast?  Do I really want to miss out because I'm scared?  The answer is no.  I want to try.  I want to succeed.  But even if I don't, at least I did something.

Now, I have 4 weeks, 6 days, and 21 hours to get at least a little tiny bit better than I am now.  It's going to be hard and I may not make it.  But I'm going to try.  I want to try.  And regardless of the outcome, at least I did it.