January Book Report: Searching for Sunday

Rachel Held Evans is divisive.  She’s a blogger and writer.  And she’s made a career out of doubting her faith, asking tough questions, and writing about them.  It’s a nice gig, if you can get it.

To date, I’ve read two of her books.  This doesn’t mean I’m a fan of hers or that I agree with her positions.  I do agree that she’s bold enough to speak her mind and not shy away from admitting that she doubts and has questions.  Just like the rest of us.

In Searching for Sunday, Evans uses a beautiful literary device transposing the traditional sacraments of the Church with her own struggles and journey of faith.  While discussing Baptism, Confession, Holy Orders, Communion, Confirmation, Anointing the Sick, and Marriage, she navigates the journey she’s been on for the past several years.

Her story isn’t new and it isn’t revelatory, but it is necessary.  I don’t always agree with her conclusions and I rarely agree with her theology, but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t enjoy this book.  Like with most of her writing, you don’t have to agree with where she ends up, you just have to understand the journey.

And I do.

I often struggle with doubt.  Mine may not be in the same ways or on the same scale as Evans, but that doesn’t mean I can’t relate.  In addition to the beauty of her writing, Evans is a master of bringing forth conversations that need to be had, sometimes unapologetic and sometimes overly apologetic.

Evans writes what she knows and this book is no different.  It is largely personal and covers what she’s gone through over the past several years struggling with Evangelicalism, a foray into the Emergent, and landing in a small Episcopalian church.  It deals largely with her hurts and her pains and how God has healed and helped her, as well as the areas where she’s still hurting.

In the end, even though I enjoyed this book, I don’t know that I would recommend this book to just the average reader or faith doubter.  You have to be on a certain foundation, I think, to get the most out of Ms. Evans’ writing.  However, for those who have the basics down, but still question would be as enamored with this book as I was.

Mental Wholeness...

Like the Westminster Catechism, I believe that the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.  However, to do this, I think we have to be holy, healthy, and whole.  We have 4 “pillars” of health:  mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical.  I believe that these correspond to Jesus’ command for us to love God with all our mind (mental), heart (emotional), soul (spiritual), and strength (physical), in Luke 10:27.

To this end, I strive to health and wholeness in each area.  Mental is one that is both easy and difficult to maintain.  There are a million apps and games out there that help with memory and cognition.  However, I’m not sure that just that is all you need for brain health.  I’ve used Brain Age and Luminosity and a couple others and they work well, but I think you need a bit more.

There is a creative and imaginative aspect to mental health, too.  I’m not much of a crafter, but I do like to think of myself as a big of a creative soul.  I’ve just gotten into the grown up coloring books that are all the rage now days.  I’ve also started Bible Journaling.

Scripture memorization is also a wonderful tactic.  You get the benefit of stretching your mental muscles with memorization and you also get the added bonus of having a wealth of scripture at your mental disposal.

These are all well and good and wonderful tools to use.  But the most fun tool for building mental health and wholeness?  Reading!  I love to read, so this may not be the same for everyone.  I like to read broadly, but I will say that my focus lately has been nonfiction and theology.  I’m trying to mix it up a bit this year with my 2016 reading list.

My usual goal is reading two books a month, but I’ll admit that I’m a bit behind schedule this month.  I’ve already finished one book and have two more started that I’m reading concurrently.  I’ve not made the time to read in the past couple weeks, but I hope to get back in the routine.

Check back in on Wednesday for my first monthly “Book Report” on the book I’ve completed.

Five Friday Favorites: Experiences

We’ve always been a family that values experiences over things.  We love traveling, seeing new places, and eating at fun restaurants.  Each year for his birthday, we gave our son an experience rather than a gift.  As he got older, he got to choose between a gift or an experience.

I’m not sure what it is about doing something rather than getting something that is so special.  But even in my own childhood, I tend to remember moments more than things.  So with that in mind, I decided to make a Friday list of 5 New Experiences for 2016.  These are either things I’ve already experienced, or I’m looking forward to this year.

1.)  Our Home – Lord willing, 2016 will be the year that we move into the first house we’ve ever owned.  Buying a home was a new experience for sure.  It will be even sweeter once we are able to finish renovations and actually live in the house that we bought.

2.)  Gardening – Along with the new house comes our homestead.  I’m quite lacking a green thumb.  I can’t keep houseplants alive.  However, I really feel strongly about eating well and I love the idea of eating locally, seasonally, and sustainably and it doesn’t get much better than growing your own food.  So now it’s just a matter of, you know, doing it.  Definitely a brand new experience!

3.) Chickens! – Keeping in line with what I’ve already listed, we are also hoping to have our coop & brooder house up and running.  This means that I won’t have to travel to Kentucky for my fresh eggs or pay an arm and a leg for chicken.  Blessedly, my husband knows all about this and all I have to do is cook.

4.) Making my Own Health & Beauty Products - This time last week, we were pretty deep into some snow.  I've lived in New England so I know how this normally goes.  But it was quite different to be experiencing it in Middle Tennessee.  One fun thing that came out of it was that a friend & I spent the afternoon making homemade, all-natural toothpaste, mouthwash, and deodorant.  It was so fun and easy and a great way to spend the afternoon while the kids played out in the snow.

5.)  Asking for Help – Now, this isn’t specifically new to 2016 or even 2015.  However, this is something that I continually struggle with and each time I have to ask for help it’s like a new experience.  I’ve never been one to ask much for help.  It’s been quite a learning curve.  But here I sit, at a friend’s house while they let us stay with them during the tough weather.  Two years ago, this wouldn’t have happened.  I would have done everything I could have to keep from having to ask for help in any way.  It’s amazing how much you can grow once you admit that you aren’t nearly as self-sufficient as you pretend to be.

What are some of your new experiences that are coming up this year?

Bible Journaling: Fad or the Real Deal

Around 10 years ago, I was in the market for a new bible.  I’d had a pocket-sized HCSB, that I loved.  It had a pretty cover, fit in my purse, and it had enough room in the margins for a few notes.  However, I had recently been introduced to the ESV and I really liked that translation.  I tried to find a version in the style and size of my HCSB, but couldn’t.  It wasn’t long before I found the ESV journaling bible.  It was great because it had large, lined margins for notes. 

Then this year, I began working at a Christian bookstore.  I noticed that journaling bibles had become a thing.  They were everywhere.  People were coming in in droves to buy them.  Churches were having classes for them.  We even had an event for it.  I also learned that “journaling” in a bible, basically meant drawing and doodling in the margins – not what I’d been doing for the past 8 years.

I flipped through one of the books on journaling and dismissed it instantly as bunk.  There were drawings over the words.  It was no longer a bible but a doodle book.  One of my co-workers who was running the event had brought her personal bible and was showing off her work.  It was good, very pretty (and not over the words), but I still dismissed it as just a fad.  Beautiful, but still a fad.

So, I went home that night, tired and weary with a headache.  All I wanted to do was take a nap before we went to church.  However, there were several things going on, so I decided to just take a few minutes and read over the Scripture that we were studying that night; it was only 2 verses, Colossians 1:1-2.  As I read them, I thought about one of the journaling books I’d looked at.  It gave instructions for journaling.

Step 1 was to read the verse and really think about what it says, looking for key words.  As I read Colossians 1:2, key words jumped out at me.  I saw what it would look like written on a page.  So, I picked up a sketch pad (still not down for doodling in my bible) and began to write the verse out using some of the journaling techniques.  Then I grabbed my colored pencils and began to think on the words and what colors they evoked.  

It was kind of amazing.  As I sat there and meditated on this verse, thinking about it and drawing it out, I began to feel energized and relaxed.  By the time I was done, my headache was gone and I was excited to go to church and study this verse that was now so vibrant in my mind.

Like with most things, I think there are good and bad aspects.  I know that there are those out there that express themselves artistically.  The journaling pages with images evoked from Scripture are amazing.  They just aren’t for me.  At the end of the day, my bible is for reading and study and I don’t like anything that may mask that.  I also like having my margins for notes and references.

However, journaling Scripture that you are studying has an amazing meditative quality to it.  It is wonderfully therapeutic.  I may not do it regularly or do one of the journaling challenges that are floating arounds, but I love the idea of using it as a devotional or study tool.

What about you?  Where do you land on bible journaling?

Stacey’s Recipe Corner: Perfect Pancakes with Brown Sugar Syrup

So, I decided to change things up a bit and try my hand at writing a recipe.  I have always loved food, but I was never much of a cook.  I always liked to bake, probably because it’s mostly just following directions.  However, for several years now, I have been cultivating my skills as a cook.  It started simply with a few “make it homemade” meals where you take store bought meals and put a new flair on them.

Then I graduated and began using real recipes.  Still mostly with pre-made ingredients, but still I could reasonably call a home-cooked meal.  After that came “from scratch.”  I worked hard to try to cook with as few processed ingredients and make as much from scratch as I could.  It turned out that it wasn’t that hard.  And so now, I feel like a full-fledged “pinch of this, pinch of that” kind of cook.

Most of the time I will still begin with a recipe from somewhere;  I try to make it the first time just as the recipe indicates, but after that I throw in my own flair, sometimes making something completely new.  I have gotten into the routine of printing my recipes so that I can make notes on them so that if something turns out really good, I can replicate it.

So, here’s the story of these pancakes:  I was a total Aunt Jemima/Mrs. Butterworth’s type of pancake mix maker.  Just Add Water were the magic words.  I loved pancakes and my boys loved pancakes, too.  It fast became a Saturday tradition.  Unfortunately one Saturday, I ran out of mix.  Not wanting to disappoint my boys, I searched Pinterest really quickly to find a pancake recipe using things I already had.  Needless to say, after having pancakes made from scratch, my boys never wanted a mix again.  (For the story on the syrup, just insert the word syrup for pancake mix in the above story – I need to do better with my grocery shopping obviously).

And now here is the recipe as I make it today:

My recipe is adapted from this one found at Like Mother, Like Daughter

And just in case, like me, you've found yourself with an entire large stack of pancakes and no syrup in sight, here's a fun, simple recipe made with just a few items that you also likely have on hand...

Quick Brown Sugar Syrup:

1 cup filtered water

1 cup brown sugar (you can use light or dark)

¼ tsp cinnamon

¼ tsp vanilla

½ tsp coconut oil

Pour all ingredients into a medium sized sauce pan.  Heat on medium heat, stirring to make sure sugar is completely dissolved.  Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 5-7 minutes.  Let cool for a few minutes before pouring into a glass container.  Store leftovers in the fridge for up to 1 week.  Mixture may separate when cooled, just heat and stir to reconstitute.

This syrup is great to dip apples or over ice cream, too.

Five Friday Favorites: Boundaries

Boundaries are difficult.  There are volumes written about boundaries.  It is spoken about frequently .  Boundaries are also very necessary.  Sometimes they can make us feel fenced in and almost claustrophobic.  Other times, they are stretched so thin, that we may wonder if they are even there at all.  I think that they key for boundaries is to make sure that you are fencing the right things in and keeping the right things out.

Here are some of the boundaries that I’ve had to set up in my life.

1.  Family.  Perhaps this is on everyone’s list?  I know that my extended family loves me and I know that they want what’s best for me.  However, not every way in which they show it is the healthiest.  I have to make sure that I have set up the proper boundaries around my immediate family and that I’m not allowing the “care” that my extended family shows to breach that.  It shows my husband respect and allows us to do what is truly best for us.

2.  My spouse.  I have to be very intentional with this one and keep proper perspective.  With just the three of us, it is easy for familiarity to creep in.  We are a close, tight-knit family and I am so very thankful for that.  But I have to remember to show that just because we are all close, we are not all on equal footing.  This is especially tough with having a teen in the house.

3.  Friends/Ministry.  I had to learn early on that just because something is good to do doesn’t mean that you should do it.  I am a reformed people pleaser.  I hate to say no or disappoint anyone.  I want to serve and help and love.  However, I had to learn that sometimes saying no is the better option and will actually help and love more than saying yes would have.

4.  Self-care.  I just learned a little more about this one and shared how vital it is.  You have to ensure that you are taking care of your whole self as much as possible before you can begin to serve others. Proper mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual care is key.   Even the flight attendants tell you to secure your own mask before helping someone else with theirs.

5.  God.  This one is unique.  Because rather than creating boundaries that keep something in or something else out, I’m learning to tear down the boundaries that I put around my God.  Rather than boxing Him in and thinking that He can only help with this, or that He’s only interested in that, I’m figuring out that He wants to be there for ALL of it.  I don’t have to put boundaries around Him or keep Him from things or out of things.  Rather, when I allow Him into everything, no matter how big or small, it automatically makes that thing better, sweeter, lovelier. 

What are some of your boundaries?  Or how are you learning to employ them better?

This post is part of a linkup with mrsdisciple.com.  Go here to check out even more on boundaries.

Making the Most of your Margins

Last week was insane.  I wasn’t quite sure why, but it was.  People were crazy.  My family was crazy.  I started to feel a little crazy myself. 

I only work part time which under normal circumstances means that I work 4-5 hours a day, 4 days a week.  Last week I worked 5 days and worked between 5-6 hours each day.  Encountering all the crazy people.  By Saturday (my first day off), I was beat.  Physically and mentally. 

I came to realized that with those few extra hours at work, everything had been thrown off, just a bit, but it was an important bit.  I wasn’t able to grocery shop for the whole week (poor planning on my part), so I was more apt to run and buy a couple things after work.  This pushed getting home even later. 

Once I got home, I had to do the normal tasks:  straighten up, do the dishes, cook dinner.  Yet, after working and running errands, I didn’t really feel like it.  Things piled up and we’d eat soup or sandwiches.  Nothing too strenuous.  I’d spend a little bit of time with Chas, and then NGD and I would watch an episode of Fringe (I was too tired by this point to watch more).  Then bed and repeat.

Add in the norm, (church, homeschooling, returning library books, etc.) and a couple of extra things in the week (going to a farm to learn the ropes on getting the milk for my milk group, NGD going to bible study with a friend, going over to our friends’ for Survivor night), and the week was just so full, it was busting at the seams.

I know that for most, this is the norm.  Most people are in a constant state of motion, running from one thing to the next.  Rushing one child to sports practice, picking another up from piano lessons, and then trying to make time for their spouse, all while trying to stay on top of work, chores, bills, and basic necessities.  And it’s hard. 

That’s one of the reasons that NGD & I work so diligently to plan ahead and intentionally try to create margins in our days and weeks.  Planning and prep really are the golden key.  I’m a visual person, so I invested in a calendar so I can see those margins.  It creates a calmness and peace to know that they are there and that I can take advantage of them without guilt.

Because without those margins this week, I wasn’t just affected by the craziness of others, I was part of it.  Saturday morning, I told my husband that I had realized that I had made little to no time that week to read, or write, or color.  I had journaled a bit on Wednesday, and even though it was really only about 10 minutes, it had calmed a raging headache and got me through the rest of the evening.

Women usually get a bad rap on this.  We tend not to practice self-care.  We spend so much time taking care of others that we minimize our own needs.  We think that this will strengthen us, yet it actually does the opposite.  When we take the time to take care of ourselves, we realize how much better we can take care of others.  It doesn’t have to be a spa day every week; it can just be a few hours doing something that recharges us.

Some of the ways that I recharge are by knitting, drawing, creating in some way, reading a book, researching holistic topics, watching a movie (by myself), or having a conversation with my husband/best friend about what’s going on with me.  There are many different things that will work.  It’s just about finding the right way for you and actually making the time to do it.  It is amazing what the results will show.

So, how do you recharge or practice self-care?